[PH]
began pestering facetiousAnimus
[FA]
at 6:17 --
PH: ?ssst! Heeeeyyy! Ezreki? Are you ...
PH: ... there?
PH: Or ...
PH: ... am I once again ...
FA: > I am INDEED, fear NOT. >;D -->
PH: ... to languish under the aus?ices of a CRUEL fate and -- oh, yay! >:D
PH: Are you busy ...
PH: ... being ...
PH: ... far, FAR too interesting for most ?eo?le to a??reciate?
FA: > ALWAYS. -->
PH: Aww. >:( Well, I don't want to ?ry you away from im?ortant deeds of heroism.
FA: > no NO -->
FA: > I can ALWAYS make TIME for YOU. -->
PH: SWOON. >;)
FA: > >;) -->
-- plotHooked
[PH]
is sending facetiousAnimus [FA] a file <risingarmageddon-stormshadowbook-chap6.doc> --
FA: /me receives file <risingarmageddon-stormshadowbook-chap6.doc>
FA: > is THIS -->
FA: > what I THINK -->
FA: > it IS? -->
FA: > you've FINISHED chapter 6? -->
PH: I don't know! I mean, to be ?erfectly honest, Ezreki, I am still a little bit lightheaded from your earlier charm. >:P My heartrate is still somewhat unsteady. If Croc?o? were around -- NOT, mind you, that I have any guarantees that he ISN'T around...
PH: ... for a Crocodile of his SIZE he is SO frustratingly QUIET --
PH: he would be very concerned.
PH: You should ...
PH: ... ?robably ...
PH: ... just read it and see.
PH: >:)
FA: > I SHALL. -->
PH: Y?AA?YY!!!
PH: [THE FILE]
Chapter 6!!!!
His footste?s echoed on the stones, drawing attention to the im?assive SILENCE that ?ervaded even the molecules of the air, that languished over the shrine like a fresh cull. There was the sense that something … something violent, something terrible … had ha??ened, that the terrible ha??ening might ha??en again at any second! The air was watchful! The ?rotaganist merely thought that it was HE the air was watching, that it was HIS terrible deeds that had caused the air to ?ermanently FLUSH for TERROR, and in truth ... on most nights, he would have been correct. But …
… There were things he did NOT know.
And as he walked back toward the night air and the calming kiss of the Alternian moonlight … those things he did NOT know … were busy knowing all about him.
Just before he ?ushed the hatch of the underground shrine fortress o?en, a sound alerted him to the ?resence of mischief. He glowered, and then ?roceeded with a ram?ant lack of caution which was of course his calling card. He THREW o?en the hatch, lea?t to the forest floor, and found himself face to face with Dead Octavi's Head. It was disgusting, the tongue bloating, the eyes gouged out, beige blood still clinging like a WOULD BE lover to his throat stum?. Dead Octavi's Head was held by aloft by …
… a hooded troll.
The hooded troll's features were almost entirely obscured by a shadow, shrouding its enigmatic countenance. Exce?t the eyes. The eyes were all too visible. Their eyes met, the ?rotaganist's and this stranger's, and their gazes CLASHED like SWORDS in an E?IC BATTLE and the hooded troll said, "y-you have gone Too far I'm preTTY sure with This one but Mr Cool Guy iTs going To be okay because I know how to fix this."
Then the hooded troll DRAGGED the STUNNED ?rotaganist into a ?ASSIONATE kiss.
His footste?s echoed on the stones, drawing attention to the im?assive SILENCE that ?ervaded even the molecules of the air, that languished over the shrine like a fresh cull. There was the sense that something … something violent, something terrible … had ha??ened, that the terrible ha??ening might ha??en again at any second! The air was watchful! The ?rotaganist merely thought that it was HE the air was watching, that it was HIS terrible deeds that had caused the air to ?ermanently FLUSH for TERROR, and in truth ... on most nights, he would have been correct. But …
… There were things he did NOT know.
And as he walked back toward the night air and the calming kiss of the Alternian moonlight … those things he did NOT know … were busy knowing all about him.
Just before he ?ushed the hatch of the underground shrine fortress o?en, a sound alerted him to the ?resence of mischief. He glowered, and then ?roceeded with a ram?ant lack of caution which was of course his calling card. He THREW o?en the hatch, lea?t to the forest floor, and found himself face to face with Dead Octavi's Head. It was disgusting, the tongue bloating, the eyes gouged out, beige blood still clinging like a WOULD BE lover to his throat stum?. Dead Octavi's Head was held by aloft by …
… a hooded troll.
The hooded troll's features were almost entirely obscured by a shadow, shrouding its enigmatic countenance. Exce?t the eyes. The eyes were all too visible. Their eyes met, the ?rotaganist's and this stranger's, and their gazes CLASHED like SWORDS in an E?IC BATTLE and the hooded troll said, "y-you have gone Too far I'm preTTY sure with This one but Mr Cool Guy iTs going To be okay because I know how to fix this."
Then the hooded troll DRAGGED the STUNNED ?rotaganist into a ?ASSIONATE kiss.
HOW COMMONDAY, the ?rotaganist thought, THIS reaction AGAIN. HOW DULL. HOW VERY LIKE A STRANGE TROLL I HAVE NEVER MET BEFORE AND WHO HAS SURELY ONLY HEARD TELL OF MY MAGNIFICENCE TO BE FLINGING HIM OR HERSELF AT MY ?ERSON. BEGGING FOR IT IF YOU WILL, YAWN, OH LOOK, NOW THERE IS TONGUE, I PROBABLY SHOULD END THIS CHARADE, IT IS SIM?LY NOT FAIR, BUT THEN, I AM SO S?ARKLING WITH ?ROTAGANISTY ENERGY, THEY CANNOT HEL? THEMSELVES, ?OOR TROLLS, SOMETIMES I ?ITY THEM, ALTHOUGH HOW I WISH SOMEONE AS COOL AS I WERE AROUND FOR ME TO ...
This internal monologue was only just beginning when the hooded troll … ceased kissing the hero and instead … began …
… kissing the dead head of Octavi!!
"What the fuck," someone said from the shadows!!!! A WITNESS!!!! To the strange debauchery!
"I would LIKE it on RECORD," said the ?rotaganist, "that I want NONE OF THIS. That I AGREE with your SENTIMENTS with ALL OF MY HEART."
FA: > DEAREST -->
FA: > ARETHUSA -->
FA: > I have PROTAGONISTIC FEELING -->
FA: > that this TROLL -->
FA: > is MODELLED -->
FA: > on that BUMBLING IDIOT PEPEIR -->
FA: > is this the CASE? -->
FA: > >;C -->
PH: >':) Oh?
PH: Would you care to ...
PH: ... elaborate ...
PH: ... on ...
PH: the extremely eloquent ...
PH: ... ">;C" ?
FA: > I do not APPROVE of using HIM in such a CONTEXT -->
FA: > I am HURT. -->
FA: > WOUNDED, EVEN. -->
FA: > WOUNDED, ARETHUSA! -->
FA: > that you would think I -->
FA: > THE PROTAGONIST -->
FA: > would STOOP to such a LEVEL of FAILURE -->
PH: Oh? What stoo?ing is the ?rotaganist DOING in Cha?ter Six, Ezreki?
FA: > you know FULL WELL! -->
FA: > engaging in UNSIGHTLY SHENANIGANS -->
FA: > with a MOOK -->
FA: > a MOOK, ARETHUSA! -->
PH: ?ray tell, if you can manage to staunch the bloodflow of your com?letely lacking in all RIGHTEOUSNESS "wounding," what exactly a "Mook" is?
FA: > a CHARACTER not WORTHY of NOTE in a STORY so ELOQUENT. -->
PH: Why not? What did he do to you, that you'd write him off so com?letely and mercilessly???? Hmm???????
FA: > he OFFENDED me with an UNBELIEVABLE measure of STUPIDITY -->
PH: ... Unbelievable? >:\
FA: > YES. -->
PH: Then
PH: I know this will be shocking
PH: I ...
PH: ... find it difficult to believe. >:\ How could someone ...
PH: ... so ...
PH: ... insignificant ...
PH: ... sooo ...
PH: ... com?letely ... small.
PH: Manage to be stu?id enough to offend YOU?
PH: I ... do not WANT ...
PH: ... in fact, I YEARN to do the o??osite ... Wish, naturally, for it to be otherwise ...
PH: ... Which is to say, I do not want to WOUND you in THIS ?articular fashion.
PH: But I fail to see the ?roblem here. >:)
FA: > he is a DOOFUS and I DON'T LIKE him. >;( -->
PH: >:(
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